Excuse me!
I have a very important question.
Who had the audacity to say this little girl could grow up?
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| Hanna |
Umm...yeah. I'm not OK with this.
What happened to the little girl who used to sneak into my room at 6 am asking me to do her hair before she left for the bus? Or the one who used to sit so quietly on my bed and listen to me rant and rave about how unjust my life was in high school? Or the one who used to be the tiny 6-year-old gymnast jumping on and off 4-inch-wide balance beams?
I forgot that life happens, that while I'm off chasing my adventures little sisters still grow up. They still continue to develop and become beautiful young women. At this moment I'm seriously regretting all the times Hanna would come to me with question or concerns and I--being oh so self absorbed--impatiently brushed them away. Or the times when she would ask to come with me and my friends to get ice cream or some chinese take out and I--feeling annoyed or pestered--told her "maybe next time."
I hope I'm not the only big sister who's going through this phase: the one where you look back on your life and wonder what you did with your time while you were still at home, sharing a bathroom and a bed with the very girls who would one day develop their own interests and pursuits. It's a time when you reflect on missed opportunities, but also cherish and anxiously hold on to the few moments when you were a good big sister. When you did listen. When you did express love. When you did share advice, tips, and even testimony.
Isn't it interesting how the tables turn? Now I'll be the one asking if I can hang out with them and their friends by driving them to all the places they wanna go on the weekends; now it's my turn to wake up at 6 in the morning, begging them to let me do their hair (Of course, now that their teenagers, they'll probably feel seriously disturbed if I do that...).
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| Nelson girls, May 2010* |
I sure my hope these little ones will give me another chance this summer to prove I really do love 'em. They're so wonderful and simply beautiful. My goodness...life comes at you fast!
*Photo by Rachel Reidhead
*Photo by Rachel Reidhead
You are not the only big sister who has little regrets. I wish I had been different when I was home, but the truth of is, I wasn't. BUT...now I do my best to make up for it. It's the little things that make a difference...and one girls night every few months or even just once a year can make up for a lot. Love you girl, you're incredible.
ReplyDeleteNo way, she really did grow up! She looks like a girl going to college. Maria is at that stage too - weird!
ReplyDeleteHoly moly! She does look older without her braces! We need to watch tangled when we go down to Mesa. I still never saw it. Your fault. Just sayin... hahaha
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